Original Posted By: "John Dilatush"
Subject: All about tools... smhdk(at)flash.net, larjowal(at)webtv.net, cwlock(at)flash.net, paulmarion(at)webtv.net, Ljtmn(at)aol.com, handyway(at)ionet.netFor the man in the family...HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate expensive parts not far from the object we are trying to hit.MECHANIC'S KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on boxes containing seats and motorcycle jackets.ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning steel Pop rivets in their holes until you die of old age, but it also works great for drilling mounting holes in fenders just above the brake line that goes to the rear wheel.PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads.HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.VICE- GRIPS: Used to round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your garage on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside a brake drum you're trying to get the bearing grease out of.WHITWORTH SOCKETS: Once used for working on older British cars and motorcycles, they are now used mainly for impersonating that 9/16 or 1/2 socket you've been searching for, the last 15 minutes.DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, splattering it against that freshly painted part you were drying.WIRE WHEEL: Cleans rust off old bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprint whorls and hard-earned guitar calluses in about the time it takes you to say, "Ouch...."HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering a motorcycle to the ground after you have installed your new front disk brake set-up, trapping the jack handle firmly under the front fender.EIGHT-FOOT LONG DOUGLAS FIR 2X4: Used for levering a motorcycle upwardoff a hydraulic jack.TWEEZERS: A tool for removing wood splinters.PHONE: Tool for calling your neighbor to see if he has another hydraulic floor jack.SNAP-ON GASKET SCRAPER: Theoretically useful as a sandwich tool for spreading mayonnaise; used mainly for getting dog-doo off your boot.E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool that snaps off in bolt holes and is ten times harder than any known drill bit.TIMING LIGHT: A stroboscopic instrument for illuminating grease build up.TWO-TON HYDRAULIC ENGINE HOIST: A handy tool for testing the tensile strength of ground straps and brake lines you may have forgotten to disconnect.CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 16-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A large motor mount prying tool that inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the end without the handle.BATTERY ELECTROLYTE TESTER: A handy tool for transferring sulfuric acid from a car battery to the inside of your tool box after determining that your battery is dead as a door nail, just as you thought.METAL SNIPS: See hacksaw.TROUBLE LIGHT: The mechanic's own tanning booth. Sometimes called a drop light, it is a good source of vitamin D, "the sunshine vitamin," which is not otherwise found under motorcycles at night. Health benefits aside, its main purpose is to consume 40-watt light bulbs at about the same rate that 105-mm howitzer shells might be used during, say, the first few hours of the Battle of the Bulge. More often dark than light, its name is somewhat misleading.PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the lids of old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splash oil on your shirt; can also be used, as the name implies, to round off Phillips screw heads and can double as oil filter removal wrench by stabbing through stubborn oil filters.AIR COMPRESSOR: A machine that takes energy produced in a coal-burning power plant 200 miles away and transforms it into compressed air that travels by hose to a Chicago Pneumatic impact wrench that grips rusty bolts last tightened 60 years ago by someone in Springfield, and rounds them off.PRYBAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to cut hoses 1/2 inch too short.For the man in the family...HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate expensive parts not far from the object we are trying to hit.MECHANIC'S KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on boxes containing seats and motorcycle jackets.ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning steel Pop rivets in their holes until you die of old age, but it also works great for drilling mounting holes in fenders just above the brake line that goes to the rear wheel.PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads.HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.VICE- GRIPS: Used to round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your garage on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside a brake drum you're trying to get the bearing grease out of.WHITWORTH SOCKETS: Once used for working on older British cars and motorcycles, they are now used mainly for impersonating that 9/16 or 1/2 socket you've been searching for, the last 15 minutes.DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, splattering it against that freshly painted part you were drying.WIRE WHEEL: Cleans rust off old bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprint whorls and hard-earned guitar calluses in about the time it takes you to say, "Ouch...."HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering a motorcycle to the ground after you have installed your new front disk brake set-up, trapping the jack handle firmly under the front fender.EIGHT-FOOT LONG DOUGLAS FIR 2X4: Used for levering a motorcycle upwardoff a hydraulic jack.TWEEZERS: A tool for removing wood splinters.PHONE: Tool for calling your neighbor to see if he has another hydraulic floor jack.SNAP-ON GASKET SCRAPER: Theoretically useful as a sandwich tool for spreading mayonnaise; used mainly for getting dog-doo off your boot.E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool that snaps off in bolt holes and is ten times harder than any known drill bit.TIMING LIGHT: A stroboscopic instrument for illuminating grease build up.TWO-TON HYDRAULIC ENGINE HOIST: A handy tool for testing the tensile strength of ground straps and brake lines you may have forgotten to disconnect.CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 16-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A large motor mount prying tool that inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the end without the handle.BATTERY ELECTROLYTE TESTER: A handy tool for transferring sulfuric acid from a car battery to the inside of your tool box after determining that your battery is dead as a door nail, just as you thought.METAL SNIPS: See hacksaw.TROUBLE LIGHT: The mechanic's own tanning booth. Sometimes called a drop light, it is a good source of vitamin D, "the sunshine vitamin," which is not otherwise found under motorcycles at night. Health benefits aside, its main purpose is to consume 40-watt light bulbs at about the same rate that 105-mm howitzer shells might be used during, say, the first few hours of the Battle of the Bulge. More often dark than light, its name is somewhat misleading.PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the lids of old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splash oil on your shirt; can also be used, as the name implies, to round off Phillips screw heads and can double as oil filter removal wrench by stabbing through stubborn oil filters.AIR COMPRESSOR: A machine that takes energy produced in a coal-burning power plant 200 miles away and transforms it into compressed air that travels by hose to a Chicago Pneumatic impact wrench that grips rusty bolts last tightened 60 years ago by someone in Springfield, and rounds them off.PRYBAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to cut hoses 1/2 inch too short.--0-2110858842-992538136=:77198--________________________________________________________________________________
Pietenpol-List: Fwd: All about tools...
Pietenpol-List: Fwd: All about tools...
Original Posted By: huffman steve
Re: Pietenpol-List: Fwd: All about tools...
Original Posted By: "shad bell"
Shad Bell,This is the sort of email "stuff" that is not appropriate for the Piet List,please refrain from sending it to the Piet group, it does not meet thecrieteria established by the host provider, Matronics.Rodger Childs----- Original Message -----
Shad Bell,This is the sort of email "stuff" that is not appropriate for the Piet List,please refrain from sending it to the Piet group, it does not meet thecrieteria established by the host provider, Matronics.Rodger Childs----- Original Message -----
RE: Pietenpol-List: Fwd: All about tools...
Original Posted By: owner-pietenpol-list-server(at)matronics.com
I thought it was funny. And I did use a hammer on my piet,there its connected.Steve E.
-----Original Message-----
I thought it was funny. And I did use a hammer on my piet,there its connected.Steve E.
-----Original Message-----Pietenpol-List: Fwd: All about tools...
Original Posted By: Craig Lawler
I liked it too...More coming with my Visit to Wisconsin and Doc Mosher and the EAATerry in Ga________________________________________________________________________________Date: Wed, 20 Jun 2001 13:13:49 -0400
I liked it too...More coming with my Visit to Wisconsin and Doc Mosher and the EAATerry in Ga________________________________________________________________________________Date: Wed, 20 Jun 2001 13:13:49 -0400
Pietenpol-List: Fwd: All about tools...
Original Posted By:> huffman steve
> All about tools...
Original Posted By: Steve Eldredge
> Subject: All about tools...> To: ALC(at)kfoc.net, t.goenjr(at)worldnet.att.net, ap_steve(at)yahoo.com,> smhdk(at)flash.net, larjowal(at)webtv.net, cwlock(at)flash.net,> paulmarion(at)webtv.net, Ljtmn(at)aol.com, handyway(at)ionet.net>>> For the man in the family...>> HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays isused> as a kind of divining rod to locate expensive parts not far from theobject> we are trying to hit.>> MECHANIC'S KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard> cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on boxes> containing seats and motorcycle jackets.>> ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning steel Pop rivets in their> holes until you die of old age, but it also works great for drillingmounting> holes in fenders just above the brake line that goes to the rear wheel.>> PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads.>> HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija boardprinciple.> It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and themore> you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.>> VICE- GRIPS: Used to round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available,they> can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of yourhand.>> OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable> objects in your garage on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease insidea> brake drum you're trying to get the bearing grease out of.>> WHITWORTH SOCKETS: Once used for working on older British cars and> motorcycles, they are now used mainly for impersonating that 9/16 or 1/2> socket you've been searching for, the last 15 minutes.>> DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flatmetal> bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings> your beer across the room, splattering it against that freshly paintedpart> you were drying.>> WIRE WHEEL: Cleans rust off old bolts and then throws them somewhere under> the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprint whorls and> hard-earned guitar calluses in about the time it takes you to say,"Ouch....">> HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering a motorcycle to the ground afteryou> have installed your new front disk brake set-up, trapping the jack handle> firmly under the front fender.>> EIGHT-FOOT LONG DOUGLAS FIR 2X4: Used for levering a motorcycle upward> off a hydraulic jack.>> TWEEZERS: A tool for removing wood splinters.>> PHONE: Tool for calling your neighbor to see if he has another hydraulic> floor jack.>> SNAP-ON GASKET SCRAPER: Theoretically useful as a sandwich tool forspreading> mayonnaise; used mainly for getting dog-doo off your boot.>> E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool that snaps off in bolt holes andis> ten times harder than any known drill bit.>> TIMING LIGHT: A stroboscopic instrument for illuminating grease build up.>> TWO-TON HYDRAULIC ENGINE HOIST: A handy tool for testing the tensilestrength> of ground straps and brake lines you may have forgotten to disconnect.>> CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 16-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A large motor mount prying tool that> inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the end without> the handle.>> BATTERY ELECTROLYTE TESTER: A handy tool for transferring sulfuric acidfrom> a car battery to the inside of your tool box after determining that your> battery is dead as a door nail, just as you thought.>> METAL SNIPS: See hacksaw.>> TROUBLE LIGHT: The mechanic's own tanning booth. Sometimes called a drop> light, it is a good source of vitamin D, "the sunshine vitamin," which isnot> otherwise found under motorcycles at night. Health benefits aside, itsmain> purpose is to consume 40-watt light bulbs at about the same rate that105-mm> howitzer shells might be used during, say, the first few hours of theBattle> of the Bulge. More often dark than light, its name is somewhat misleading.>> PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the lids of old-style> paper-and-tin oil cans and splash oil on your shirt; can also be used, asthe> name implies, to round off Phillips screw heads and can double as oilfilter> removal wrench by stabbing through stubborn oil filters.>> AIR COMPRESSOR: A machine that takes energy produced in a coal-burningpower> plant 200 miles away and transforms it into compressed air that travels by> hose to a Chicago Pneumatic impact wrench that grips rusty bolts last> tightened 60 years ago by someone in Springfield, and rounds them off.>> PRYBAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracketyou> needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.>> HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to cut hoses 1/2 inch too short.>>> For the man in thefamily...> > HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays isused> as a kind of divining rod to locate expensive parts not far from theobject> we are trying to hit.> > MECHANIC'S KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents ofcardboard> cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on boxes> containing seats and motorcycle jackets.> > ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning steel Pop rivets intheir> holes until you die of old age, but it also works great for drillingmounting> holes in fenders just above the brake line that goes to the rearwheel.> > PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads.> > HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija boardprinciple.> It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, andthe more> you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your futurebecomes.> > VICE- GRIPS: Used to round off bolt heads. If nothing else isavailable, they> can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of yourhand.> > OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting variousflammable> objects in your garage on fire. Also handy for igniting the greaseinside a> brake drum you're trying to get the bearing grease out of.> > WHITWORTH SOCKETS: Once used for working on older British cars and> motorcycles, they are now used mainly for impersonating that 9/16 or1/2> socket you've been searching for, the last 15 minutes.> > DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flatmetal> bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest andflings> your beer across the room, splattering it against that freshly paintedpart> you were drying.> > WIRE WHEEL: Cleans rust off old bolts and then throws them somewhereunder> the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprint whorlsand> hard-earned guitar calluses in about the time it takes you to say,"Ouch...."> > HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering a motorcycle to the groundafter you> have installed your new front disk brake set-up, trapping the jackhandle> firmly under the front fender.> > EIGHT-FOOT LONG DOUGLAS FIR 2X4: Used for levering a motorcycle upward> off a hydraulic jack.> > TWEEZERS: A tool for removing wood splinters.> > PHONE: Tool for calling your neighbor to see if he has anotherhydraulic> floor jack.> > SNAP-ON GASKET SCRAPER: Theoretically useful as a sandwich tool forspreading> mayonnaise; used mainly for getting dog-doo off your boot.> > E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool that snaps off in bolt holesand is> ten times harder than any known drill bit.> > TIMING LIGHT: A stroboscopic instrument for illuminating grease buildup.> > TWO-TON HYDRAULIC ENGINE HOIST: A handy tool for testing the tensilestrength> of ground straps and brake lines you may have forgotten to disconnect.> > CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 16-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A large motor mount prying toolthat> inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the endwithout> the handle.> > BATTERY ELECTROLYTE TESTER: A handy tool for transferring sulfuricacid from> a car battery to the inside of your tool box after determining thatyour> battery is dead as a door nail, just as you thought.> > METAL SNIPS: See hacksaw.> > TROUBLE LIGHT: The mechanic's own tanning booth. Sometimes called adrop> light, it is a good source of vitamin D, "the sunshine vitamin," whichis not> otherwise found under motorcycles at night. Health benefits aside, itsmain> purpose is to consume 40-watt light bulbs at about the same rate that105-mm> howitzer shells might be used during, say, the first few hours of theBattle> of the Bulge. More often dark than light, its name is somewhatmisleading.> > PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the lids of old-style> paper-and-tin oil cans and splash oil on your shirt; can also be used,as the> name implies, to round off Phillips screw heads and can double as oilfilter> removal wrench by stabbing through stubborn oil filters.> > AIR COMPRESSOR: A machine that takes energy produced in a coal-burningpower> plant 200 miles away and transforms it into compressed air thattravels by> hose to a Chicago Pneumatic impact wrench that grips rusty bolts last> tightened 60 years ago by someone in Springfield, and rounds them off.> > PRYBAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip orbracket you> needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.> > HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to cut hoses 1/2 inch too short.> > > >> --0-2110858842-992538136=:77198-->>________________________________________________________________________________
> Subject: All about tools...> To: ALC(at)kfoc.net, t.goenjr(at)worldnet.att.net, ap_steve(at)yahoo.com,> smhdk(at)flash.net, larjowal(at)webtv.net, cwlock(at)flash.net,> paulmarion(at)webtv.net, Ljtmn(at)aol.com, handyway(at)ionet.net>>> For the man in the family...>> HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays isused> as a kind of divining rod to locate expensive parts not far from theobject> we are trying to hit.>> MECHANIC'S KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard> cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on boxes> containing seats and motorcycle jackets.>> ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning steel Pop rivets in their> holes until you die of old age, but it also works great for drillingmounting> holes in fenders just above the brake line that goes to the rear wheel.>> PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads.>> HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija boardprinciple.> It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and themore> you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.>> VICE- GRIPS: Used to round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available,they> can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of yourhand.>> OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable> objects in your garage on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease insidea> brake drum you're trying to get the bearing grease out of.>> WHITWORTH SOCKETS: Once used for working on older British cars and> motorcycles, they are now used mainly for impersonating that 9/16 or 1/2> socket you've been searching for, the last 15 minutes.>> DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flatmetal> bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings> your beer across the room, splattering it against that freshly paintedpart> you were drying.>> WIRE WHEEL: Cleans rust off old bolts and then throws them somewhere under> the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprint whorls and> hard-earned guitar calluses in about the time it takes you to say,"Ouch....">> HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering a motorcycle to the ground afteryou> have installed your new front disk brake set-up, trapping the jack handle> firmly under the front fender.>> EIGHT-FOOT LONG DOUGLAS FIR 2X4: Used for levering a motorcycle upward> off a hydraulic jack.>> TWEEZERS: A tool for removing wood splinters.>> PHONE: Tool for calling your neighbor to see if he has another hydraulic> floor jack.>> SNAP-ON GASKET SCRAPER: Theoretically useful as a sandwich tool forspreading> mayonnaise; used mainly for getting dog-doo off your boot.>> E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool that snaps off in bolt holes andis> ten times harder than any known drill bit.>> TIMING LIGHT: A stroboscopic instrument for illuminating grease build up.>> TWO-TON HYDRAULIC ENGINE HOIST: A handy tool for testing the tensilestrength> of ground straps and brake lines you may have forgotten to disconnect.>> CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 16-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A large motor mount prying tool that> inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the end without> the handle.>> BATTERY ELECTROLYTE TESTER: A handy tool for transferring sulfuric acidfrom> a car battery to the inside of your tool box after determining that your> battery is dead as a door nail, just as you thought.>> METAL SNIPS: See hacksaw.>> TROUBLE LIGHT: The mechanic's own tanning booth. Sometimes called a drop> light, it is a good source of vitamin D, "the sunshine vitamin," which isnot> otherwise found under motorcycles at night. Health benefits aside, itsmain> purpose is to consume 40-watt light bulbs at about the same rate that105-mm> howitzer shells might be used during, say, the first few hours of theBattle> of the Bulge. More often dark than light, its name is somewhat misleading.>> PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the lids of old-style> paper-and-tin oil cans and splash oil on your shirt; can also be used, asthe> name implies, to round off Phillips screw heads and can double as oilfilter> removal wrench by stabbing through stubborn oil filters.>> AIR COMPRESSOR: A machine that takes energy produced in a coal-burningpower> plant 200 miles away and transforms it into compressed air that travels by> hose to a Chicago Pneumatic impact wrench that grips rusty bolts last> tightened 60 years ago by someone in Springfield, and rounds them off.>> PRYBAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracketyou> needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.>> HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to cut hoses 1/2 inch too short.>>> For the man in thefamily...> > HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays isused> as a kind of divining rod to locate expensive parts not far from theobject> we are trying to hit.> > MECHANIC'S KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents ofcardboard> cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on boxes> containing seats and motorcycle jackets.> > ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning steel Pop rivets intheir> holes until you die of old age, but it also works great for drillingmounting> holes in fenders just above the brake line that goes to the rearwheel.> > PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads.> > HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija boardprinciple.> It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, andthe more> you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your futurebecomes.> > VICE- GRIPS: Used to round off bolt heads. If nothing else isavailable, they> can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of yourhand.> > OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting variousflammable> objects in your garage on fire. Also handy for igniting the greaseinside a> brake drum you're trying to get the bearing grease out of.> > WHITWORTH SOCKETS: Once used for working on older British cars and> motorcycles, they are now used mainly for impersonating that 9/16 or1/2> socket you've been searching for, the last 15 minutes.> > DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flatmetal> bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest andflings> your beer across the room, splattering it against that freshly paintedpart> you were drying.> > WIRE WHEEL: Cleans rust off old bolts and then throws them somewhereunder> the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprint whorlsand> hard-earned guitar calluses in about the time it takes you to say,"Ouch...."> > HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering a motorcycle to the groundafter you> have installed your new front disk brake set-up, trapping the jackhandle> firmly under the front fender.> > EIGHT-FOOT LONG DOUGLAS FIR 2X4: Used for levering a motorcycle upward> off a hydraulic jack.> > TWEEZERS: A tool for removing wood splinters.> > PHONE: Tool for calling your neighbor to see if he has anotherhydraulic> floor jack.> > SNAP-ON GASKET SCRAPER: Theoretically useful as a sandwich tool forspreading> mayonnaise; used mainly for getting dog-doo off your boot.> > E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool that snaps off in bolt holesand is> ten times harder than any known drill bit.> > TIMING LIGHT: A stroboscopic instrument for illuminating grease buildup.> > TWO-TON HYDRAULIC ENGINE HOIST: A handy tool for testing the tensilestrength> of ground straps and brake lines you may have forgotten to disconnect.> > CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 16-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A large motor mount prying toolthat> inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the endwithout> the handle.> > BATTERY ELECTROLYTE TESTER: A handy tool for transferring sulfuricacid from> a car battery to the inside of your tool box after determining thatyour> battery is dead as a door nail, just as you thought.> > METAL SNIPS: See hacksaw.> > TROUBLE LIGHT: The mechanic's own tanning booth. Sometimes called adrop> light, it is a good source of vitamin D, "the sunshine vitamin," whichis not> otherwise found under motorcycles at night. Health benefits aside, itsmain> purpose is to consume 40-watt light bulbs at about the same rate that105-mm> howitzer shells might be used during, say, the first few hours of theBattle> of the Bulge. More often dark than light, its name is somewhatmisleading.> > PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the lids of old-style> paper-and-tin oil cans and splash oil on your shirt; can also be used,as the> name implies, to round off Phillips screw heads and can double as oilfilter> removal wrench by stabbing through stubborn oil filters.> > AIR COMPRESSOR: A machine that takes energy produced in a coal-burningpower> plant 200 miles away and transforms it into compressed air thattravels by> hose to a Chicago Pneumatic impact wrench that grips rusty bolts last> tightened 60 years ago by someone in Springfield, and rounds them off.> > PRYBAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip orbracket you> needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.> > HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to cut hoses 1/2 inch too short.> > > >> --0-2110858842-992538136=:77198-->>________________________________________________________________________________
Pietenpol-List: Fwd: All about tools...
Original Posted By:> huffman steve
> All about tools...
Original Posted By: javier cruz
> Subject: All about tools...> To: ALC(at)kfoc.net, t.goenjr(at)worldnet.att.net, ap_steve(at)yahoo.com,> smhdk(at)flash.net, larjowal(at)webtv.net, cwlock(at)flash.net,> paulmarion(at)webtv.net, Ljtmn(at)aol.com, handyway(at)ionet.net>>> For the man in the family...>> HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays isused> as a kind of divining rod to locate expensive parts not far from theobject> we are trying to hit.>> MECHANIC'S KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard> cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on boxes> containing seats and motorcycle jackets.>> ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning steel Pop rivets in their> holes until you die of old age, but it also works great for drillingmounting> holes in fenders just above the brake line that goes to the rear wheel.>> PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads.>> HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija boardprinciple.> It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and themore> you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.>> VICE- GRIPS: Used to round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available,they> can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of yourhand.>> OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable> objects in your garage on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease insidea> brake drum you're trying to get the bearing grease out of.>> WHITWORTH SOCKETS: Once used for working on older British cars and> motorcycles, they are now used mainly for impersonating that 9/16 or 1/2> socket you've been searching for, the last 15 minutes.>> DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flatmetal> bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings> your beer across the room, splattering it against that freshly paintedpart> you were drying.>> WIRE WHEEL: Cleans rust off old bolts and then throws them somewhere under> the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprint whorls and> hard-earned guitar calluses in about the time it takes you to say,"Ouch....">> HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering a motorcycle to the ground afteryou> have installed your new front disk brake set-up, trapping the jack handle> firmly under the front fender.>> EIGHT-FOOT LONG DOUGLAS FIR 2X4: Used for levering a motorcycle upward> off a hydraulic jack.>> TWEEZERS: A tool for removing wood splinters.>> PHONE: Tool for calling your neighbor to see if he has another hydraulic> floor jack.>> SNAP-ON GASKET SCRAPER: Theoretically useful as a sandwich tool forspreading> mayonnaise; used mainly for getting dog-doo off your boot.>> E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool that snaps off in bolt holes andis> ten times harder than any known drill bit.>> TIMING LIGHT: A stroboscopic instrument for illuminating grease build up.>> TWO-TON HYDRAULIC ENGINE HOIST: A handy tool for testing the tensilestrength> of ground straps and brake lines you may have forgotten to disconnect.>> CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 16-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A large motor mount prying tool that> inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the end without> the handle.>> BATTERY ELECTROLYTE TESTER: A handy tool for transferring sulfuric acidfrom> a car battery to the inside of your tool box after determining that your> battery is dead as a door nail, just as you thought.>> METAL SNIPS: See hacksaw.>> TROUBLE LIGHT: The mechanic's own tanning booth. Sometimes called a drop> light, it is a good source of vitamin D, "the sunshine vitamin," which isnot> otherwise found under motorcycles at night. Health benefits aside, itsmain> purpose is to consume 40-watt light bulbs at about the same rate that105-mm> howitzer shells might be used during, say, the first few hours of theBattle> of the Bulge. More often dark than light, its name is somewhat misleading.>> PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the lids of old-style> paper-and-tin oil cans and splash oil on your shirt; can also be used, asthe> name implies, to round off Phillips screw heads and can double as oilfilter> removal wrench by stabbing through stubborn oil filters.>> AIR COMPRESSOR: A machine that takes energy produced in a coal-burningpower> plant 200 miles away and transforms it into compressed air that travels by> hose to a Chicago Pneumatic impact wrench that grips rusty bolts last> tightened 60 years ago by someone in Springfield, and rounds them off.>> PRYBAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracketyou> needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.>> HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to cut hoses 1/2 inch too short.>>> For the man in thefamily...> > HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays isused> as a kind of divining rod to locate expensive parts not far from theobject> we are trying to hit.> > MECHANIC'S KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents ofcardboard> cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on boxes> containing seats and motorcycle jackets.> > ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning steel Pop rivets intheir> holes until you die of old age, but it also works great for drillingmounting> holes in fenders just above the brake line that goes to the rearwheel.> > PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads.> > HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija boardprinciple.> It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, andthe more> you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your futurebecomes.> > VICE- GRIPS: Used to round off bolt heads. If nothing else isavailable, they> can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of yourhand.> > OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting variousflammable> objects in your garage on fire. Also handy for igniting the greaseinside a> brake drum you're trying to get the bearing grease out of.> > WHITWORTH SOCKETS: Once used for working on older British cars and> motorcycles, they are now used mainly for impersonating that 9/16 or1/2> socket you've been searching for, the last 15 minutes.> > DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flatmetal> bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest andflings> your beer across the room, splattering it against that freshly paintedpart> you were drying.> > WIRE WHEEL: Cleans rust off old bolts and then throws them somewhereunder> the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprint whorlsand> hard-earned guitar calluses in about the time it takes you to say,"Ouch...."> > HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering a motorcycle to the groundafter you> have installed your new front disk brake set-up, trapping the jackhandle> firmly under the front fender.> > EIGHT-FOOT LONG DOUGLAS FIR 2X4: Used for levering a motorcycle upward> off a hydraulic jack.> > TWEEZERS: A tool for removing wood splinters.> > PHONE: Tool for calling your neighbor to see if he has anotherhydraulic> floor jack.> > SNAP-ON GASKET SCRAPER: Theoretically useful as a sandwich tool forspreading> mayonnaise; used mainly for getting dog-doo off your boot.> > E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool that snaps off in bolt holesand is> ten times harder than any known drill bit.> > TIMING LIGHT: A stroboscopic instrument for illuminating grease buildup.> > TWO-TON HYDRAULIC ENGINE HOIST: A handy tool for testing the tensilestrength> of ground straps and brake lines you may have forgotten to disconnect.> > CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 16-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A large motor mount prying toolthat> inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the endwithout> the handle.> > BATTERY ELECTROLYTE TESTER: A handy tool for transferring sulfuricacid from> a car battery to the inside of your tool box after determining thatyour> battery is dead as a door nail, just as you thought.> > METAL SNIPS: See hacksaw.> > TROUBLE LIGHT: The mechanic's own tanning booth. Sometimes called adrop> light, it is a good source of vitamin D, "the sunshine vitamin," whichis not> otherwise found under motorcycles at night. Health benefits aside, itsmain> purpose is to consume 40-watt light bulbs at about the same rate that105-mm> howitzer shells might be used during, say, the first few hours of theBattle> of the Bulge. More often dark than light, its name is somewhatmisleading.> > PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the lids of old-style> paper-and-tin oil cans and splash oil on your shirt; can also be used,as the> name implies, to round off Phillips screw heads and can double as oilfilter> removal wrench by stabbing through stubborn oil filters.> > AIR COMPRESSOR: A machine that takes energy produced in a coal-burningpower> plant 200 miles away and transforms it into compressed air thattravels by> hose to a Chicago Pneumatic impact wrench that grips rusty bolts last> tightened 60 years ago by someone in Springfield, and rounds them off.> > PRYBAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip orbracket you> needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.> > HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to cut hoses 1/2 inch too short.> > > >> --0-2110858842-992538136=:77198-->>________________________________________________________________________________Date: Mon, 18 Jun 2001 11:23:26 -0700 (PDT)
> Subject: All about tools...> To: ALC(at)kfoc.net, t.goenjr(at)worldnet.att.net, ap_steve(at)yahoo.com,> smhdk(at)flash.net, larjowal(at)webtv.net, cwlock(at)flash.net,> paulmarion(at)webtv.net, Ljtmn(at)aol.com, handyway(at)ionet.net>>> For the man in the family...>> HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays isused> as a kind of divining rod to locate expensive parts not far from theobject> we are trying to hit.>> MECHANIC'S KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard> cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on boxes> containing seats and motorcycle jackets.>> ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning steel Pop rivets in their> holes until you die of old age, but it also works great for drillingmounting> holes in fenders just above the brake line that goes to the rear wheel.>> PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads.>> HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija boardprinciple.> It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and themore> you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.>> VICE- GRIPS: Used to round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available,they> can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of yourhand.>> OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable> objects in your garage on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease insidea> brake drum you're trying to get the bearing grease out of.>> WHITWORTH SOCKETS: Once used for working on older British cars and> motorcycles, they are now used mainly for impersonating that 9/16 or 1/2> socket you've been searching for, the last 15 minutes.>> DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flatmetal> bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings> your beer across the room, splattering it against that freshly paintedpart> you were drying.>> WIRE WHEEL: Cleans rust off old bolts and then throws them somewhere under> the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprint whorls and> hard-earned guitar calluses in about the time it takes you to say,"Ouch....">> HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering a motorcycle to the ground afteryou> have installed your new front disk brake set-up, trapping the jack handle> firmly under the front fender.>> EIGHT-FOOT LONG DOUGLAS FIR 2X4: Used for levering a motorcycle upward> off a hydraulic jack.>> TWEEZERS: A tool for removing wood splinters.>> PHONE: Tool for calling your neighbor to see if he has another hydraulic> floor jack.>> SNAP-ON GASKET SCRAPER: Theoretically useful as a sandwich tool forspreading> mayonnaise; used mainly for getting dog-doo off your boot.>> E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool that snaps off in bolt holes andis> ten times harder than any known drill bit.>> TIMING LIGHT: A stroboscopic instrument for illuminating grease build up.>> TWO-TON HYDRAULIC ENGINE HOIST: A handy tool for testing the tensilestrength> of ground straps and brake lines you may have forgotten to disconnect.>> CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 16-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A large motor mount prying tool that> inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the end without> the handle.>> BATTERY ELECTROLYTE TESTER: A handy tool for transferring sulfuric acidfrom> a car battery to the inside of your tool box after determining that your> battery is dead as a door nail, just as you thought.>> METAL SNIPS: See hacksaw.>> TROUBLE LIGHT: The mechanic's own tanning booth. Sometimes called a drop> light, it is a good source of vitamin D, "the sunshine vitamin," which isnot> otherwise found under motorcycles at night. Health benefits aside, itsmain> purpose is to consume 40-watt light bulbs at about the same rate that105-mm> howitzer shells might be used during, say, the first few hours of theBattle> of the Bulge. More often dark than light, its name is somewhat misleading.>> PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the lids of old-style> paper-and-tin oil cans and splash oil on your shirt; can also be used, asthe> name implies, to round off Phillips screw heads and can double as oilfilter> removal wrench by stabbing through stubborn oil filters.>> AIR COMPRESSOR: A machine that takes energy produced in a coal-burningpower> plant 200 miles away and transforms it into compressed air that travels by> hose to a Chicago Pneumatic impact wrench that grips rusty bolts last> tightened 60 years ago by someone in Springfield, and rounds them off.>> PRYBAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracketyou> needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.>> HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to cut hoses 1/2 inch too short.>>> For the man in thefamily...> > HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays isused> as a kind of divining rod to locate expensive parts not far from theobject> we are trying to hit.> > MECHANIC'S KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents ofcardboard> cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on boxes> containing seats and motorcycle jackets.> > ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning steel Pop rivets intheir> holes until you die of old age, but it also works great for drillingmounting> holes in fenders just above the brake line that goes to the rearwheel.> > PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads.> > HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija boardprinciple.> It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, andthe more> you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your futurebecomes.> > VICE- GRIPS: Used to round off bolt heads. If nothing else isavailable, they> can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of yourhand.> > OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting variousflammable> objects in your garage on fire. Also handy for igniting the greaseinside a> brake drum you're trying to get the bearing grease out of.> > WHITWORTH SOCKETS: Once used for working on older British cars and> motorcycles, they are now used mainly for impersonating that 9/16 or1/2> socket you've been searching for, the last 15 minutes.> > DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flatmetal> bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest andflings> your beer across the room, splattering it against that freshly paintedpart> you were drying.> > WIRE WHEEL: Cleans rust off old bolts and then throws them somewhereunder> the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprint whorlsand> hard-earned guitar calluses in about the time it takes you to say,"Ouch...."> > HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering a motorcycle to the groundafter you> have installed your new front disk brake set-up, trapping the jackhandle> firmly under the front fender.> > EIGHT-FOOT LONG DOUGLAS FIR 2X4: Used for levering a motorcycle upward> off a hydraulic jack.> > TWEEZERS: A tool for removing wood splinters.> > PHONE: Tool for calling your neighbor to see if he has anotherhydraulic> floor jack.> > SNAP-ON GASKET SCRAPER: Theoretically useful as a sandwich tool forspreading> mayonnaise; used mainly for getting dog-doo off your boot.> > E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool that snaps off in bolt holesand is> ten times harder than any known drill bit.> > TIMING LIGHT: A stroboscopic instrument for illuminating grease buildup.> > TWO-TON HYDRAULIC ENGINE HOIST: A handy tool for testing the tensilestrength> of ground straps and brake lines you may have forgotten to disconnect.> > CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 16-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A large motor mount prying toolthat> inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the endwithout> the handle.> > BATTERY ELECTROLYTE TESTER: A handy tool for transferring sulfuricacid from> a car battery to the inside of your tool box after determining thatyour> battery is dead as a door nail, just as you thought.> > METAL SNIPS: See hacksaw.> > TROUBLE LIGHT: The mechanic's own tanning booth. Sometimes called adrop> light, it is a good source of vitamin D, "the sunshine vitamin," whichis not> otherwise found under motorcycles at night. Health benefits aside, itsmain> purpose is to consume 40-watt light bulbs at about the same rate that105-mm> howitzer shells might be used during, say, the first few hours of theBattle> of the Bulge. More often dark than light, its name is somewhatmisleading.> > PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the lids of old-style> paper-and-tin oil cans and splash oil on your shirt; can also be used,as the> name implies, to round off Phillips screw heads and can double as oilfilter> removal wrench by stabbing through stubborn oil filters.> > AIR COMPRESSOR: A machine that takes energy produced in a coal-burningpower> plant 200 miles away and transforms it into compressed air thattravels by> hose to a Chicago Pneumatic impact wrench that grips rusty bolts last> tightened 60 years ago by someone in Springfield, and rounds them off.> > PRYBAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip orbracket you> needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.> > HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to cut hoses 1/2 inch too short.> > > >> --0-2110858842-992538136=:77198-->>________________________________________________________________________________Date: Mon, 18 Jun 2001 11:23:26 -0700 (PDT)